My CRUSH on M.J. (pre-plastic surgery) lol.

Blogging: "I dreamed of meeting him and he would say "Where you going Candace, you P.Y.T.? You're looking BAD in those BILLIE JEANS. I'm not just trying to BEAT IT, I just wanna ROCK WITH YOU and I promise it will be a THRILLER and I (won't) STOP TILL U GET ENOUGH, That's just my HUMAN NATURE baby. I know those jokers treat you like you're some DIRTY DIANA, but you're aura has me bouncing OFF THE WALLS. -Can.Ali.

THIS IS WHERE I'M MOVING!! YOU GOOOOOTTA SEE THIS HOME- WOOOOW!!

Portabello - Luxury Real Estate Tour

"...I'm here to take your daughter out" lmao

Martin Lawrence & Will Smith Givin Sum Kid Hard Time, Bad Boys 2

THESE SONGS GO HARD... BIG APPLE, HERE I COME BAYBAAAYYY!!

Kanye West - All Falls Down

New York Shit

INHALE....

So you thought you’ve experienced life? On my simple yet perfect day, I would get up at 8:15am and go to the beach, I would pack food in a picnic basket, throw on a cute summer dress and dab on sun tan oil. I would drive with the top down listening to a CD I mixed, nod my head and sing along with my favorite parts. 

When I get to the beach, I would lay out my blanket and rest my radio on the cooler. After stretching and jogging, I kick my feet around in the water. Realize I miss my girls so I join them to invite me. They show up. We laugh at the fat man in his speedos and have our girl moments over apple juice, fruits and turkey sandwiches.

As the suns rays get warmer, someone says “lets go to the spa”. But before we do that, lets splash in the ocean and take a pic. “MYSPACE!!!”.. and the camera goes click. 

The lady rubs oil into my skin and I almost drift off into bliss thinking random thoughts...mostly about him (smile). I get my nails painted and my hair washed from the smell of ocean water. We go shopping and It doesn’t take me long to find the right size and the right fit. I check out the garment, the design, the stitch, the label because it means more to me than my friends understand, that passion is in me.

We part ways and I rush home, He calls me. 

I dance in the mirror admiring my own reflection, how beautiful. I shower, dress, spray on Ja’dore and I’m out the door. Usher’s “trading places” vibrating the back of my chair. My heart sinks when I see him, but I try to act cool about it. We eat, we laugh, we dance, we connect...I already know he’s the one, and right before we kiss...

The alarm goes off.

I wake up and Its 12:06 pm. I hurry out of bed...woke up late cus I spent the previous night arguing again. I forget to put my summer dress in the dryer so I just throw on a t-shirt and shorts. I still pack my basket, maybe too full. I drive in silence to the beach. 

Its windy, the wind gets all over my towel and the suns rays sting me. I call my girls and none of them can make it so I share my food with the seagulls. I try to run but my feet sink in the sand. I give up, going to the spa would make me feel better. 

The lady is massaging me too hard. Its not enjoyable and my manicure gets messed up on the shower door. 

I go shopping and find my happiness again. I look at the stitching, I look at the garments...I look at the receipts and realize i’ve spent too much money. My passion seems so far away and I’m too addicted to the 9-5 money. 

My phone ringing interrupts my thoughts, Its him. he said he can’t make it.

I go home and get in my zone, start to make dinner, watch a little t.v. and fall asleep.

My girl calls me and says, “lets go somewhere.” I’m not in the mood but I do. I shower, throw on my stylish dress, spray some perfume and go.

I dance and like the buzz the alcohol is giving me. My girls are surrounding me laughing, enjoying themselves, Stares from other girls show how hot we are. I still show them love cause I have no reason to hate them. I walk to the bathroom with Shan leading the way. She pauses. The look on her face wld have made you think someone spilled a drink on her shoes...but naw, it was Him...with her. laughing and enjoying each other, the way we used to. 

My pride is gone as she whispers “I told you so....”

I go home and let the pillow absorb my tears, I wake up the next morning not feeling like myself. Facing my own fears of doubts, regrets, and questions....

Then I hear a voice say “You’re in the fire, everything you’ve gained, you’ve lost. I know your heart. You want to give up but you’re not done going through the fire. Thats where you’ll find yourself. Thats when you’ll have no choice but to depend on me. Thats when all of your questions will be answered, and things you forgot to appreciate will be held in recognition. Thats when you’ll learn to trust me. Even when nothing seems to make sense. Because the same level of hurt, guilt, pain, confusion, frustration, insecurities, and mountains that you’ve dealt with will be the same degree of Love, Happiness, Patience, fulfillment, joy, reward and justification is what you’ll receive in return. stay encouraged...its not as far as you think it may be”

I get up out of bed, dry my tears, wash my face, pack my lunch and head to the beach. Driving with the top down I inhale and take a breathe of fresh air. The sun warms my soul and I’m finally at peace.

It may not mean anything to you...

HAVEN'T BEEN OUT MUCH LATELY...IF I KEPT RUNNING ON MYSPACE/FACEBOOK, NOTHING ELSE WOULD GET DONE RIGHT??...LOL. 

YOUR GIRL IS SO FOCUSED, I KNOW ALOT OF PPL SAY THAT, BUT I REALLY AM. I SEE MY FUTURE UNFOLDING MORE EVERYDAY. THEY SAY YOU MAKE THE BEST DECISIONS WHEN YOUR MIND IS FREE AND YOUR HEART IS WHOLE. SO I TAKE NOTHING FOR GRANTED. I'VE BEEN INVESTING MY ENERGY INTO MY FUTURE: GOD, SCHOOL, WORK, DESIGN, MUSIC, WRITING. I'D BE FOOLISH TO SIT ON MY TALENTS. SOME PEOPLE WERE BORN TO BE AVERAGE BUT I CAN'T SETTLE FOR THAT.

MY PASSION IS TOO BIG. 

I'VE MET ALOT OF PPL IN THE PROCESS. I'M GRATEFUL FOR MY FAMILY AS WELL AS THE FRIENDS I'VE MADE AND ALL THE NEW ONES I'VE FOUND. YOUR LOVE IS GENUINE. YOU REMAIN POSITIVE AS WE ALL SHARE THE SAME GOALS...THANKS FOR EVERYTHING...THANKS FOR BEING YOU. 

IT MAY NOT BE ANYTHING TO YOU BUT MY IMAGINATION IS CRAZY....SOMETIMES I DREAM ABOUT THE FUTURE: IN SCHOOL, WATCHING MY DESIGNS GO FROM PAPER TO WALKING ACROSS THE CATWALK, HAVING LUNCH IN PARIS, STARRING AT THE BEAUTIFUL VIEW OUT THE WINDOW OF MY OFFICE, OR CUTTING THE RIBBON AT THE OPENING OF MY STORES.

OR AT THE STUDIO...WHEN THE GUYS THINK I'M JUST A PRETTY FACE... BUT WHEN I OPEN MY MOUTH, THEY LOOK IN AMAZEMENT LIKE "DID SHE REALLY JUST SAY THAT"?...LOL.

OR EXPRESSING MY IDEA'S IN THE MAGAZINE FOR THE MASS TO READ. ANYTHING FROM FASHION TO EDITORIALS 

IT MAY NOT BE ANYTHING TO YOU BUT MY RESUME IS EXTENSIVE, THEREFORE, I WILL NEVER EXPECT LESS THAN THE BEST FROM ME. HAVEN'T BEEN ON MYSPACE AS MUCH CAUSE I'M JUST SIMPLY DOING ME. WHEN I'M WALKING THRU A GORGEOUS HOUSE IN SOUTH BEACH, WHEN I'M DRIVING IN MY CAR THAT MATCHES MY SHOES, WHEN I'M RUBBING ELBOWS WITH THOSE WHO INSPIRE ME, WHEN I'M GOING OUT DOING SOMETHING FABULOUS WITH MY SEXY HUSBAND, WHEN I'M WATCHING MY FUTURE CHILDREN GROW UP IN LOVE...I'LL KNOW THAT ALL THIS WAS WORTH IT. 

STILL REMAINING HUMBLE.

SO WHEN YOU PICK UP A MAGAZINE AND SEE MY NAME...OR WHEN YOU READ MY BOOK...OR YOU WALK INTO MY RESTAURANT...OR YOU WALK INTO MY STORE OR DEPARTMENT AT NEIMAN MARCUS...THEN YOU'LL UNDERSTAND.

Crushing Hard (Old Blog)

I swear, fellas got me laughing @ how they're acting...

I'm a challenge, a little more than the average,

Takes a lot more than game to "bag" this,

But when I see you, I forfeit, You're number 1 on my list.

Break my neck as you pass me by,

Crack a smile, Damn!! You're SO FINE, starring in these eyes of mine.

What I'm thinking is considered a crime.

But what I visualize could be real in a matter of time.

So I sit back waiting for these chicks to hop off it,

Watch it!! they're only out to get in ya' pockets.

Swing my bat, They're the target, be ready to dodge it...

Cus' I can't have you rolling with garbage.

Can.Ali. has way better plans, 

like spending stacks of cash wrapped in rubber bands, all out spoiling her man...

Never worry bout my other fans,

Cus' my fingers feel complete and it's only when i'm holding your hands.